Ah, springtime. Flowers are blooming, birds are singing, and pollen is coating every surface—including the inside of my nose. It’s a season of fresh starts: green leaves, fluffy ducklings, and new opportunities to grow.
So, what’s going on in your marriage garden right now? Is it in full bloom, or are the dry twigs of winter still creaking loudly? Maybe it’s time to grab that metaphorical watering can and invest in your relationship. Just as a garden thrives with consistent care, a marriage flourishes through daily acts of love and service. Small, intentional efforts add up over time, leading to a deeper, more fulfilling connection.
It’s easy to have the thoughts about what you should do to invest in your marriage but it can definitely seem a little daunting, especially if you have the busyness of life swirling around you. How can you plant small seeds daily that will turn into deep roots of connection for you and your spouse?
The Power of Small Acts
Love isn’t built in grand gestures alone but in everyday moments. Showering your love with roses or expensive cigars is wonderful, if that’s their vibe. But those big gestures can get expensive and lose their shine over time. And if you’re anything like me, those big gestures just don’t do it for me. And if you’re anything like me, those big gestures just don’t hit the same. I’ve had the conversation with Michael a thousand times—I don’t need (or even want) an expensive date night or a fancy handbag. What I crave is knowing he’s thinking about me. The few times he’s brought me my favorite drink on the way home? That meant more than a beautiful bracelet he once gifted me. Because what that small gesture really says is, “Out of all the things I could be thinking about—I chose you.”
Now, this can look different for everyone. We all receive love in different ways. While I light up over a sweet tea from Chick-fil-A, someone else might feel deeply loved when their spouse takes over a chore, leaves a kind note, sends a midday encouragement text, or offers a warm kiss when they walk in the door.
The key is understanding how your spouse receives love best. For example, Michael’s go-to is doing something for me—acts of service. And while that’s kind and meaningful, it doesn’t always fill up my love tank the same way that small, thoughtful surprises do.
Just like planting a seed, small acts of love may not show immediate results, but they grow over time. Remember Galatians 6:9: “Let us not grow weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.”
Don’t expect your spouse to be blown away at your first attempt, and don’t give up if you miss a few opportunities. Take small, intentional steps. One at a time.
Serving Each Other With Joy
Marriage is a sacrificial situation. It’s not about making you happy. It’s about serving your spouse, growing closer to each other each day. Choosing to serve your spouse with joy rather than obligation strengthens the relationship. That might sound heavy, but there’s joy in it too. When you shift from “I have to do this” to “I get to do this,” everything changes.
What a blessing that I get to help my spouse with dinner. How awesome is it that I can make the bed so they have a soft place to land after a long day?
That simple mindset shift allows you to serve with joy instead of feeling overworked, overwhelmed, or overused. (Not to say those feelings aren’t real—but sometimes, feelings follow actions. Give it a shot.)
Speaking Life Into Your Marriage
I tend to be critical by nature. Not on purpose, and never to hurt—but I have that perfectionist, “let’s get this right” kind of brain. And while those aspects of my personality have a purpose and make me really good at DIY projects, it doesn’t always serve me in marriage. My tendency to look at everything with an eye of scrutiny, has negatively impacted my relationship with my husband on my occasions.
Michael will come to me with an idea, and my instinct is to “how” or “but” it to death. I pick it apart because I want to understand every angle—but as you can imagine, that doesn’t exactly create connection. Sometimes I need to intentionally choose words that build him up. Maybe the idea isn’t perfect. Maybe it needs work. But instead of rushing to fix it, I can meet him with enthusiasm and support. The details can come later.
Proverbs 18:21 says, “Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruit.” Your words matter. Use them to encourage, support, admire, and appreciate your spouse, boosting connection and fostering a loving environment.
Try saying,
- “I appreciate you because…”
- “I’m proud of you for…”
- “I love how you…”
Speak life into your marriage to continue to sow seeds of love and connection.
Patience and Trust: Waiting for the Harvest
Like any garden, love requires patience. Investing in each other daily, serving with joy, and speaking life into your relationship—these are ways to water the garden of your marriage.
Not every season will feel vibrant. But consistency, faith, and trust in God’s timing will yield a beautiful harvest. Ecclesiastes 3:1 reminds us, “For everything there is a season, and a time for every activity under heaven.”
Start small. Choose one act of love to incorporate today. Over time, these small seeds will grow into a deeply rooted, thriving marriage.
What’s one small act of love you can do for your spouse today?
Enjoy the Adventure,
Amanda
The Making of Marriage 
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