The Making of Marriage

Dinner and a movie. Strolls through the park. Drinks and chatting. 

What are common date nights that can become routine for $300, Alex. (RIP Mr. Trebeck)

Many couples fall back on the same routine date of dinner at their favorite restaurant, maybe a quick stroll through the streets, and home before 10pm. (Not only can this become boring, but those dates can also add up.)  Bust up the routine with an unconventional date— a work out. Working out together can enhance your marriage by deepening your emotional connection, encouraging mutual health and growth, and really builds a legacy of togetherness. 

Michael and I have very little in common as far as shared interests go. We share a love of hiking, tacos, and for Jesus, but for the longest time it was our interest in each other that keeps us going. We’d been married for a couple of years when Michael started working out, outside of running. He jumped on that gym membership train. It took a little bit, but I hopped on board and my love for weightlifting blossomed. We were going to the gym almost daily, sharing workouts, spotting each other, and spending genuine time with one another. It became a routine that wasn’t routine. Each workout was different and fresh, offering new ways to connect. Of course working out releases feel-good hormones, enhancing your mood and connection. In the words of Elle Woods, “Happy people just don’t shoot their husbands; they just don’t.” 

So what does a gym date entail? Pretty much whatever you want, really. Plan ahead for your gym date— have some exercises in mind or join a class together. Find an activity that matches your fitness level or choose something new to try. Maybe you choose to go with a collaborative workout where you move through some partner exercises or spot each other during weightlifting. We choose a “work out near each other” approach. We often share a bench (and occasionally dumbbells), swapping out sets and making jokes throughout our independent workouts. The opportunity for little touches and silly jokes are high. He’s there to spot me if I need it and I’m always encouraging to do more pelvic floor exercises (these are important for men, too!). We also tend to branch off and do our own thing, stealing glances and making eyes across the gym before meeting up at the treadmill for a cooldown walk. 

What if I’m not into fitness? What about my gym anxiety? What if we feel awkward? —all valid concerns. The great thing about having a gym date with your main squeeze is that you get to experience it all together. Start small, maybe a super light workout or beginner yoga class. Opt for less crowded times of the day to venture to the gym. And really, having someone to feel awkward with is a benefit of marriage— you get to be awkward and have fun together! 

A workout date is a great opportunity to build emotional intimacy by stepping out of your comfort zones together, strengthening trust and connection. You have your partner encouraging you and this motivation is bound to seep into other parts of your marriage. The memories you build together with this seemingly routine activity are endless, with the opportunity to become stories to share and laugh about later. By nurturing teamwork, health, and mutual growth, couples create a dynamic partnership that is resilient, supportive, and deeply fulfilling. These activities go beyond surface-level enjoyment to build a relationship that thrives on connection, purpose, and joy.

With the new year rolling up soon, look at adding some gym dates to your calendar as a New Year’s Resolution. If you already workout with your spouse, share a favorite workout memory from a gym date with your spouse!